★ I'm AWESOME
7:37 PM

I'm sorry I didn't spend much time with you grandfather. Now that your age is increasing and your health is failing, I'm beginning to regret. Sigh. Please take care grandfather. I don't want to lose you. Sigh. Everyone's very worried for you. I'll keep you constantly in my prayers. You and grandmom both.

Grandad's currently in the hospital. Everyone's worried sick and I have been spending the last two nights with grandmom. She's worried too, but she doesn't say it out. I can only pray that nothing goes wrong during the check up and that God's protecting is with you grandad. I love you. I really do. I don't say it out often to you. But I know you know I love you. When I take your papery-wrinkled hands and rub them. I love you grandad and grandmom.

I look like a mess lately. Not enough sleep, worrying about everything, that constant migrane. Sigh. I'm amazed I haven't broken down yet. God give me the grace to carry on.

worried sick / messed

Labels: go STRESSED

Damn. I'm sick today. Flu, headache and sore throat. Didn't attend service at all this week. But I watched the online service though. Pretty good. Hahas. And I'm finally forced to face this problem that has been bothering me for weeks, or should I say years? Didn't come to a conclusion, and didn't have a solution either. Sigh. I can't say it all out here. Hmm. If you really wanna know, ask me yourself.

Footnote:I LOVE MY BABY! <33.
Nitez.

Labels: go STRESSED

This is how my situation is like now. I can't go forward neither can I head back. I stuck at this crossroad. No one wants to guide me on which route to choose. I left all on my own. I'm terrified at the consequences of my choices. No one likes to see their choices backfire right back at their faces right? So why can't anyone just help me make a decision, stick with me through the consequences and get it over with? What I really need now is divine guidance from above and wisdom from above. God guide my path.

Pressure coming towards me from all angles. I really don't know how to handle it. I can't crumble. I just can't. And I won't. I'll make sure I won't. God will hold me together no matter what. Have faith. Even though it's hard, just have faith. Sigh. It's getting harder and harder to counsel myself. )=

I'll try to sleep tonight. Even though it will be a sleepless night again. Praise the Lord for the downpour. At least the coolness of the night will help in soothing me to sleep.

Flames to dust,
Lovers to friends.
Why do all good things come to an end?

Labels: go STRESSED

I don't even know the answer to that question. Sigh. How can I say I know myself then? A part of me still wants to go back to school, to study and get that freaking cert. Yet, another part of me just wants to give up and stop here. Find a proper job and hit the books again after 2 years of thinking through. Should I get a poll on this?

The rain is driving me nuts. Sadly, this IS the monsoon season, as I've learnt in Geography. And there's nothing I can do about it except to face this screen till my eyes go blur. Sigh. Of course, I can choose to go back to school. Which I think I won't for the time being. Or I can study, which is a much better time killer but it is too, a brain cell killer in my point of view. So, the computer is my current best friend to kill time. =/

Just got an e-mail from my dear primary school BESTIE, Nicolette. She's in New York studying since we were secondary 1. Miss her so badly. But she has matured alot and her english standard is now better than mine by a thousand times. But still, I love you sweetie. Even with your slang and all. =)

I've to make a decision soon and fast. By the end of this week. To quit or not to quit. Sigh. Can someone provide me with an answer?

The only event I'm looking forward to is the Dinner & Dance of JOL Zone. I already have new friends in mind! Hahas. Plus, I have already planned my outfit [the iS dress my dear WeiShan bought for me] and accessories [the Charles and Keith pumps my darling bought] and I'm sure I'll look absolutely divine that night! (x

-stressed beyond humane levels.

Labels: go STRESSED

Sigh. I'm so stressed out. Family, school, financial. LIFE'S A BURDEN.

-faints.

Labels: go STRESSED

This is just a simple webpage about me.
And my awesomeness.

Randy Lai YH
Seventeen
08.11.94
Nanyang Polytechnic
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